The Month of St Valentine

This is the month when love is in the air, thanks to Saint Valentine.  But here is a thought for you.  When did you last give yourself a Valentine ?

This is not as strange as it might seem.  As anyone who knows true love will tell you, the more love that you give, the more you receive.  This starts an amazing circle of ever-increasing love, which makes your eyes shine; your energy level rises and improves every aspect of your life.

The place to start this whole cycle going is with self-love.  This doesn’t mean selfishness and introspection.  It means taking time out to truly appreciate all your great qualities, skills and talents.

Many people benefit from this simple change to their approach to love.  So many of us are brought up in a culture where it is considered bad form to put yourself first, we severely limit the love that we have to give.

If you don’t love yourself, you may feel that you are unlovable by someone else.  At best, this can make you doubt any expressions of love that you receive.  At worst, it can even make you repel those who want to love you and that can result in the collapse of a relationship.

Self-love is not the same as selfishness.  It is the ability to acknowledge all your good points instead of a continual focus on your faults.  It means looking into the mirror and seeing a person of great potential.  When you can do this, you can look the world in the eye, you can give freely and you can project love outwards to others.

The reason so many people never get to find the one true love that the Valentine’s cards talk about is because the whole idea of self-love is alien to them. If they think about it as self-esteem, then it becomes more acceptable.  Every truly happy and successful person has high self-esteem.  This is not the same as arrogance or conceit; it is about giving as much credibility to your positive qualities as you do to all the others.

Once you have addressed the issue of self-esteem, then everything else just falls into place.  The process of increased awareness is simple, gradual and very effective.  The biggest pay-off is that, when you have done it once, you have it for all time.  Then you become truly aware that you can be, do or have whatever you want in life – and that includes love.

We are all born with a good awareness of ourselves.  What subsequently happens is that we remember all the negative things that others tell us about ourselves and these can swamp our opinions about the good qualities that we have.  Decide to base your impressions of self on what you truly know to be true instead of the opinions of others and you are well on the way to building up that never-ending store of love that is your birthright.


About adob4sight

I am a coach, facilitator, and coach supervisor who works with key decision makers in business as well as private individuals, helping them maximise performance at work or in their lives outside the workplace. At 4sight Communications we work predominently with individuals in a one-to-one relationship facilitating the adaption of behaviours and attitudes to improve performance. Particular areas around which assistance is sought are: communications, leadership, relationships, work/life balance, addressing change and conflict, time management, goal setting and clarifiation of values. We also conduct team facilitation and coaching for middle ranking and senior teams of up to 10 persons. We are qualified to administer and interpret a series of psychometric assessments - ranging from 'personality profiling' to measuring an individual's 'mental toughness quotient'. All assessments are followed up with one-to-one sessions clarifying and facilitating areas indentified for development. One of the psychometrics used can be adapted for the recruitment of senior staff with the organisation able to input criteria for a particular post. We have qualified coaching supervisors who will provide a service for both professional coaches as well as 'internal company' coaches to ensure that not only the coach his/herself is properly developed, but also the interests of the client/coachee are served and ethics are adhered to. If you are interested in any of the 'above', get in touch !
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